Here's a nugget of knowledge that I feel needs to be shared.
When you're angry at someone, for any reason whatsoever, you shouldn't go out and try and get revenge. Like egging their house for example. That was the last time I think I ever really saw Trent, and I was at my absolute worst. And now that he's gone it's really hard knowing that, that was how things ended between us. It's awful that his death was all it took for me to see that it was a bad decision on my part, and maybe that's why I felt obligated to go to his wake.
I didn't want to spend a lot of time there because again, everyone present already sort of knew about the egging. I guess I also just don't like the general atmosphere of funerals, but then again, who really does? There were some kids I knew from my High School there, and we talked a little. I think most of them were surprised I came.
A couple of them were speculating on how Trent died and one of them mentioned they thought it had something to do with drugs. I did hear he was cremated, which is a little odd because I was almost positive his family would have wanted to bury him. It was when people started getting into the details of how his body looked when it was found, that I decided to go. But not before paying my respects to his parents. I wanted to apologize for the eggs and make it clear I really was sorry for their loss.
They seemed glad I'd apologized, or as glad as they could seem. His mom said that she had some things for me that he had kept, like on of my sweatshirts. I got them came in the mail two days ago but I'm not exactly in the mood to go through them.
I don't know why Trent broke up with me, but the more I think about it, I suppose I must not have made things easy for the two of us. Whatever it was, that was his choice, and I should have respected it, rather than trying to get back at him. He didn't deserve to die.
I haven't been able to sleep this week, I really need to try and put this out of my mind.
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